A Message to Parents Right Now

If you’re a parent of a queer or gender-diverse child, the news from Tuesday (compounded with yesterday’s news) regarding a potential federal ban on gender-affirming care may have landed in your body before it landed in your brain.

When I read the news, I felt my chest tighten, my mind went into a million directions, and I got that familiar ache of knowing just how much harder things are about to get for queer kids.

So, don’t feel as if you’re overreacting.

When policies threaten access to gender-affirming care (even indirectly), they don’t just affect clinics or providers. The ripple effect seeps into homes, classrooms, and dinner-table conversations.

And kids feel that ripple.

They may not have the language for it yet, but they can feel that shift in adult tone and can almost see the tension. They notice when safety starts to feel conditional.

That’s why this moment matters so much; not just politically, but relationally.

Because when the world becomes uncertain, children look to the adults in their lives to find out whether they are still safe.

At Rainbow Roots, we don’t pretend parents need to have all the answers.

What we know - from lived experience, from research, and from listening to queer kids themselves - is this:

Kids don’t need perfect parents. They need regulated parents.

Parents who can say, “I don’t know what’s coming next, but I’m here, and I’m not going anywhere.”

Gender-affirming care is often mischaracterized as radical or reckless.

In reality, it is deeply conservative in the truest sense of the word:

It conserves life. It conserves dignity. And it conserves the bond between a child and the adults who love them.

When access is threatened, kids don’t suddenly become “confused.”

They become scared.

And fear isn’t something children should have to manage alone.

So here is what matters right now, regardless of what happens next:

• Staying connected to your child, even when you’re scared

• Letting your child see that your love is not conditional

• Modeling calm, not certainty

• Choosing protection over performance

To the queer kids who may find this:

You are not broken. You are not a debate. And you are not alone.

To the parents reading this:

You are allowed to feel angry, sad, overwhelmed, or exhausted.

And you are still capable of being a safe place.

Rainbow Roots exists because the most powerful buffer against harm is not policy alone, it’s grown adults who are willing to show up differently.

We will keep building. We will keep teaching. And we will keep centering queer kids’ safety EXACTLY where it belongs.

One more thing: If this news is bringing up anxiety, fear, or just a lot of feelings (for you and/or your child), please know there are resources available so you don’t have to process those feelings alone. You can head to our “Resources” page to find what’s right for you, or you can get support right now:

Trans Lifeline (U.S.): 877-565-8860

The Trevor Project: 866-488-7386 or text START to 678678

Asking for support is an act of care, for yourself and for the kids you love.

That’s all for now, and don’t forget to take good care of yourself today.